What About Now?
by Ember1313
Summary: This what I think should have happened after Alan's funeral.
1. Chapter 1

Rating: M / NC 17 (just to be safe)

Disclaimer:  
I own nothing related to or affiliated with Disney, ABC Daytime, or General Hospital. Characters are not mine; they are merely being borrowed.

**AN:**  
I seriously need to stop listening to all music. I can't keep up with the stories I have going and I'm going to start another one. Dam muse! She really is a bitch.

This was supposed to be a one shot but it's so long i'm going to break it up a bit. Only three parts. It's my take on how things could have happened. It start from Alan's funeral. It's my first short piece so be kind.

* * *

**What About Now??**

**Part 1/3**

Elizabeth sat in what could be called the Quatermaine living room. She was hiding. From Lucky, Emily, and everyone she cared about. Especially Jason. Liz couldn't take the pain on his face anymore. It was killing her to know she was the cause of all his pain. To know that with a few words she could take it all away.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elizabeth knew she shouldn't be there. She had no right. In fact she firmly believed she had given up all her rights when it came to Jason the moment she asked him to give up their child. Still here she was on the day of Alan's funeral. Elizabeth knew he was alone. She just wanted to comfort him. However wrong that may be. She softly knocked on the door praying he would be too angry to see her.

Jason was surprised to see her but he let her in anyways. He told her that she should be at Alan's service. That Emily needed her. They talked about losing someone. She tried to help him find comfort in losing a father he never really knew. Then the baby, their baby kicked. Jason reached out instinctively. Then he pulled away just as quickly. Liz had gently took his hand and placed it on her stomach. When Jason felt the baby kick he looked so happy. Then she had to go and screw it up, again. It seems that was all she was capable of anymore.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elizabeth sat lost in thought. Tears running unchecked down her face. _"That was Alan's favorite chair."_ Monica said from the doorway.

_"No. Yes. I don't know. I really shouldn't burden you with this."_

_"You look like you could use someone to talk to."_

_"You have enough to deal with. It wouldn't be right to add to it."_

_"You look as sad as I feel. It would help me if I could help you."_

Elizabeth looked at Monica, she was so sincere. Just like Jason. The realization caused fresh tears to fall from her eyes. _"Have you ever done something you knew was wrong, unforgeably wrong, even while you were doing it but did it anyways?"_

_"I think everyone has at some point."_

_"How can I take back all the pain I caused?"_

_"You can't but you can move past it. Alan and I did many times."_

_"Really?"_

_"That's what love is. Move past the pain and savoring the good."_

_"You really miss him don't you?"_

_"Terribly."_

_"I should go before some misses me. Thank you Monica. You really helped me."_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_"Let it go Spinelli."_

_"But Stone Cold.."_

_"I mean it. I don't want to hear about it anymore."_

_"It's not fair. You would be the world's most awesome dad."_

_"Spinelli stop. No more. Do you understand?"_

_"Sure thing Stone Cold, but I'm here if you need to vent or something."_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Liz looked around the Spencer house cursing silently. _What in the world was she doing?_ Monica's words kept playing in the back of her mind. It seems she was the only one who thought she should make things right for her. She wondered if Jason knew how much he was like Monica? The thing was Elizabeth hated herself. She hated what she was doing. The pain she was causing. Even if people didn't know about it. This had to stop soon.

_"Lizzie, are you down here?"_

God how she hated that name. Why couldn't he just call her Liz or Elizabeth? More importantly, why couldn't Lucky just leave her alone for five minutes? She felt so trapped. It was like he knew she was unsure of her choice. Unsure? Hell that didn't even come close to describe how she felt. _What she was doing?_ She asked herself for the millionth time. Liz shook her head. _"Yeah. How are things going up there?"  
_

_" Well it would go better if you decided on a color."_

_"I know. I just can't choose. You've been so great about it too."_

_"I just want you happy."_ Lucky said. Liz could hear the sincerity in his voice.

_"I want that too. I think I'm going for a walk. Maybe it will clear my head."_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elizabeth walked down by the docks. She wondered if she purposely choose the most likely place to run in to Jason. Probably. She seemed like she enjoyed causing them both as much pain as possible. _"Hi."_

_"Hi."_ Jason said standing up.

_"I... um was just taking a walk trying to decided."_

"We're in the middle of painting Cam's room.. and the baby's in our new house. Well Lucky's old house but now were moving in. And I'm having a hard time choosing a paint color. Lucky wants it pink and I don't think that's such a good idea. I decided to go for a walk to clear my head."

_"Another good reason for my walk."_

_"Ah.. how... how are you feeling?"_

_"The baby's doing really well. How are you?"_

_"When I see you like this, when I see you happy I know I did the right thing."_

_Happy, was he kidding?_ Jason used to be the one person who knew when she was pretending. Now he was just like everyone else. _"I shouldn't be talking to you about paint colors."_

_"Its okay. I don't mind hearing about your plans. So did you pick a color?"_

_"Cameron picked out the color of the Santa Fe train. His choice not mine. I'm still thinking about..I want to do a mural but I'm not sure of a theme yet."_

_"Yeah. It's funny cause when Michael was young I used to read him this travel book about Africa. Elephants, and giraffes, and lions, and monkeys. Kids love those animals."_ Elizabeth laughed softly. _"And you know dinosaurs. Of course."_

Jason cellphone rang stopping whatever she was going to say. _"Excuse me. I'm on the pier. Why? What do you need?"_ Elizabeth saw that it was business so she decided to leave. She had a shift soon anyways.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jason stood with Sonny in the Cellar. They were discussing the problems Sam's new job was creating for them. Reporters were following both of them constantly. It was starting to affect the business. The Five Families wanted this taken care of. Now. Sam either had to sign the restraining order or quit the show.

Then without warning all hell broke loose. Three gun men had appeared from nowhere. Shots rang out and before Jason knew what was happening it was over. The gunmen were dead. Sonny just had a minor head wound. Nothing serious. As the cops questioned him Jason was thankful for the first time about giving up his child. Doing so meant his son or daughter would never know this life. Sigh softly Jason left the Cellar to go check on Sonny.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elizabeth was half way through her shift. She loved working. Especially lately. It was the only time Lucky couldn't hover over her. She knew he was worried. And it was sweet. But she just couldn't take it anymore. Lucky's concern only fueled her guilt and anger. Why wasn't he this worried last summer when he was tearing their world to shreds? Why wasn't she and Cameron enough?

_"Hey, Elizabeth, you want to grab something after work?"_

Liz smiled at Robin. It was like her friend knew exactly when she needed someone. "_That sounds nice. Cam is with Grams so I'm sure she won't mind."_ Liz said before doubling over in pain.

_"Hey what's wrong?"_

"I think I just had a contraction."


	2. Chapter 2

Rating: M / NC 17 (just to be safe)

Disclaimer:  
I own nothing related to or affiliated with Disney, ABC Daytime, or General Hospital. Characters are not mine; they are merely being borrowed.

**AN:**  
I seriously need to stop listening to all music. I can't keep up with the stories I have going and I'm going to start another one. Dam muse! She really is a bitch.

This was supposed to be a one shot but it's so long i'm going to break it up a bit. Only three parts. It's my take on how things could have happened. It start from Alan's funeral. It's my first short piece so be kind.

* * *

**What About Now??**

**Part 2/3**

Jason wondered around the emergency room waiting on news about Sonny. God he hated hospitals. They put him on edge or maybe it was knowing Elizabeth was nearby. He ached to go see Elizabeth. Hear her voice. He said he'd stay away. He promised her. Still, he was here for a legitimate reason. What would it hurt to just sat hi?

He stepped of the elevator on to the sixth floor running right in to Monica. "_Sorry I wasn't paying attention. How are you doing?"_ It had only been a week since Alan's funeral, he was surprised to see Monica working.

_"I'm good. It's hard to be here but there no place else I'd rather be. Are you here to see Elizabeth?"_

_"No. Sonny's in the emergency room. I'm just walking around."_

_"Oh. Well you might want to stop by her room. I'm sure she could use the support."_

Jason head snapped up in attention. _"Something is wrong with Elizabeth?"_

_"She was having contractions earlier. I'm really worried about her. I saw her at Alan's funeral and.. well lets just say the poor girl could really use a friend right now."_

_"I'm going to check on her. Thanks for telling me."_ Jason practically ran to Elizabeth's room. He stopped just outside and tried to pull himself together. She didn't need anymore stress. When he stepped in his heart broke at the sight. Elizabeth looked even smaller than usual. Something primal deep in Jason demanded he protect her. Protect them both. _"Elizabeth?"_

Her head raised slowly at the sound of his voice, emotions warring within her. Relief that it wasn't Lucky, along with guilt caused by the look on Jason's face. _"Hey."_

_"Are you okay?"_

_"I.. um... they gave me some medicine to stop the contractions. Hopefully its works."_

_"Is there something, anything I can do?"_

_"No."_ Elizabeth said her voice barely a whisper.

_"Okay but if you need anything I'm here."_

"I know, but it not fair or right of me to ask."

_"I'll always care about you. Nothing can_ _change that."_ Jason sat down in the chair beside her bed. They sat in silence for what seemed like hours. It was the kind of comfortable silence you rarely find between two people.

_"Jason? What if I loose the baby?"_ Elizabeth asked her fear evident in her voice.

_"You won't."_

_"How can you be so sure?"_

_"I believe, I know that our baby has your strength and stubbornness. He or she is going to be just fine. Trust me."_

Liz just nodded. Her eyes were already heavy with sleep. Jason relax slightly knowing that sleep would be the best thing for both of them. He waited till he was sure Elizabeth was completely asleep, then Jason placed his hand on Elizabeth's abdomen where his child lay. _"Hey there baby. I know you're anxious to meet your mom and big brother but you need to stay put for just a little longer. Your mom loves you so much. Just hang in there. I love you too."_ Jason whispered softly as his eyes filled up with tears. He stood up quickly and left the room.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Days had passed since she was released from the hospital and she hadn't seen Jason once. It should have made thing easier. He was keeping his promise to stay away. Instead it only made her feel worse. Kelly practically order her to relax and stay away from stress. If she only knew.

Her and Lucky kept sniping at each other. He had become so demanding since she took him back. They fought over everything. The color of the baby's nursery, names, the fact she wouldn't set a wedding date, most of they fought over her refusal to have sex with him. Elizabeth knew she was being unfair but she just couldn't force herself to do it. She loved Jason. He was the only man she ever wanted to touch her.

Maybe that's how she ended up having lunch with Monica. The older women had helped her so much in the last few days. The ironic part is she didn't even realize it. Monica had quickly become the person Liz sought out when thinking about Jason became too much. It had turned in to a little ritual with them. Liz would tell Monica about her frustrations and guilt. While Monica would share her life. It gave both women something they needed. An unbiased ear to bend.

Monica was surprised to learn she enjoyed Elizabeth's company. She had never given much thought to her, beyond being Emily's friend. It turns out Elizabeth was a smart, strong, loyal and compassionate person. She actually reminded Monica of Lila at times.

Elizabeth loved listening about Jason's childhood. He was such a different person now. She hoped their child was more like the man he had become. The man she loved. _"Monica can I ask you something kind of personal? You don't have to answer if you don't want to."_

_"Well it would depend on the question."_

_"It's just.. I was wondering what you regret the most?"_

_"That's not easy to answer. I've done a lot I wish I could take back. Lying about A.J. Comes to mind. It messed up his relationship with Alan permanently."_

_"What did you lie about?" _Monica blinked in surprise she was sure everyone knew about the whole sorted incident. After taking a deep breath Monica began to tell the young women about the lie that surround A.J.'s birth. How it had changed the way Alan treated him for years.

Elizabeth sat listening to Monica's story. It could have almost been about her situation. She though back to Alan's funeral, Jason looked so broken. In part because he never knew Alan. She didn't want that to be her son or daughter someday. She knew exactly what she needed to do regardless of who got hurt. _"Monica, I'm sorry I need to go. There's this thing I have to take of now."_

"I understand dear. Let me know if you need anything."

_"I will. Thank you for everything."_ Liz said as she hurried out of the hospital cafeteria.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jason pinched the bridge of his nose in an effort to fight off the headache he knew was coming. Spinelli meant well but he just couldn't take a hint. _"I don't want to hear it anymore. I meant it."_

_"But Stone Cold this is killing you. You have a right to be a father to the Innocent One. You'd be so great at it."_

_"Its not going to happen so just drop it. Please?"_

_"Why not? It's not fair..."_

_"Life isn't fair Spinelli. It's about time you learned that. I can't break my promise to Elizabeth. I've never lied to her before. I'm not going to start now."_

_"You love her!! Oh My God!! You love Nurse Hottie!"_

_"What did you call her?"_ Jason asked shooting Spinelli a cold, lethal glare.

_"Dude that's what you heard?"_ Jason just glared even harder at him. "_Okay. Okay. Sorry Stone Cold no disrespect intended. But you love her. Dude this is big. Wait what about Fair Sam?"_

_"I care about Sam but Elizabeth is my everything. I'd do anything to see her happy. Even walk away."_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elizabeth walked in to the coffeehouse suddenly unsure about her decision. Taking a deep breathe she shook off any doubts, she knew this was right. Liz walked up to Milo who was guarding the office door.

_"Yeah, he's with Spinelli. You want to talk to him?"_

_"If he'll see me."_

_"Wait here." _Milo knocked nervously on the door. Jason had been in a foul mood all day. He counted to ten then went in._"Hey boss? Someone here to see you."_

_"Milo, who is it? I don't have time for interruptions."_

_"Ms. Webber, sir."_

_"Alright. Send her in."_

Elizabeth almost immediately stepped into the office. _"Thank you for seeing me. I.. um... having something I need to say to you."_

_"Go ahead."_

_"Could we talk alone? It's about..."_

_"Spinelli knows."_

_"Oh, that's good. I'm glad you have some to talk to. Not talk well not really that you ever really talk. But in this case you might need to. I know that you've been having hard time. And I know it's all my fault. I happy that you've been able to..."_

_"Elizabeth?"_

_"What?"_

_"Breathe. You came hear to tell me something?"_

_"Oh, right that. I just wanted to say I'm sorry about.."_

_"Elizabeth, you don't need to keep apologizing to me. As long as and the baby are happy that's all I need."_

_"Are you done? Because I'd like to finish."_ Jason motioned for her to continue._ "Like I was saying I'm sorry that I'm forcing you to do something that goes against everything you believe._

_"No one makes me do anything."_

_"Jason please just let me finish. It was wrong of me to even think of asking. I betrayed your trust in me. I can't believe you don't hate me. Mostly because I hate myself. I don't want our child, your child to not know you. It's just things were so intense. That's no excuse though. I need to fix this, starting now."_

_"What are you saying?"_

_"I regret what I've done to you, our baby, me. I guess what I'm getting at is I changed my mind."_


	3. Chapter 3

**What About Now??**

**Part 3/3**

_"I know. I'm completely sure."_

_"Spinelli get out. Elizabeth and I need to talk alone."_

_"Sure Stone Cold no problem."_

_"Don't you want this baby?"_

_"You know I do more than anything but.."_

_"But what you either want us... this baby or you don't."_

_"What do you want from me, Elizabeth? I've done everything I could for you."_

_"Everything but fight."_ Elizabeth mumbled.

_"That's it? That's what you've wanted from me? God Elizabeth if I known that..."_ Jason said raking his hands through his hair._"Fine I'm fighting now. **I want you. I want our child. I want Cameron. I want my family.** I want to be us to be selfish for once. You and the children are my world. Please marrying me not because of the baby, but because I love you."  
_

_"You love me?"_

_"I've always loved you. Since that winter in your studio."_

_"I love you too. Yes. I'll marry you."_ Jason reached out and pulled Elizabeth towards him. Causing her body to crash softly into his. One hand gripped her waist. The other instantly went to her hair. Jason lowered his head and brushed his lips across hers. He ran he tongue over her bottom lip in a silent plea. A plea she quickly granted. Jason slid his tongue into her mouth wanting to explore every inch. Elizabeth's hand that had been clenching his shirt moved up to his hair. _"Jason please."_ she begged.

_"Please what? Tell me what you want."_ Jason whispered against her ear.

_"You."_

"You have me." He replied pulling far enough to remove his shirt along with her dress. He stared openly at her beautiful figure. Her breasts, that were slightly fuller than before, were covered by a simple white cotton bra. She wore white panties as well. What drew his attention however was her swollen abdomen. Oh god how he wanted her. He removed her bra and tossed onto the floor. Jason maneuvered her so she was sitting on top of the desk before taking Elizabeth's nipple into his mouth. He sucked, then nipped gently, before soothing it with his tongue. Then he started all over again. Elizabeth had begun to rock against him desperately seek some relief from the ache that had settled between her legs. Jason smirked against her skin as he moved over to her other breast giving it the same attention.

Elizabeth's hands slid down his chest making him groan. Her artistically inclined finger made quick work of his belt, snap and zipper. She reached hand in inside his boxers and stroked him gently. His hard, swollen cock twitched at the contact. Jason closed his eyes at her touch. After a few strokes her grabbed her wrist and pulled her away. Seeing questions that filled her eyes he told her, _"I've waited seven months to have you again but if you keep that up I'm going to lose it."_ Elizabeth's eyes filled with passion knowing how close to the edge he was.

Their lips crashed together again in a desperate, hungry kiss. It was like neither one could get enough of the other. Their hands explored, relearning what brought the other pleasure. Jason could feel how wet she was even trough his jeans. He had wanted to be gentle but he wasn't sure that was going to happen. They were both too far gone now.

Jason tugged at her panties ripping them off of her, the sound making him harden even more. Elizabeth pushed his jeans down past his narrow hips and firm ass. Jason stepped in between Elizabeth's open legs. With one hand he began to caress her center making sure she was completely ready for him. Her hips bucked of f the desk. _"Jason."_ Elizabeth whimpered.

_"I not going to hurt either of you am I?"_

"No. It's okay." With her reassurances Jason removed his hand and placed the tip of his cock into her wet center.. He pulled back enough to look into her bark blue eyes. He saw no hesitation. Only passion, desire and love. Jason gripped both her hips before plunging into her. Elizabeth moaned his name. Their pace was hard and fast. Meeting each other stroke for stroke, in perfect rhythm. It had been too long since August.

Jason knew they were both close. He could feel her tight walls spasming. He reached down to strum her clit with his thumb. Elizabeth bit her lip to keep from crying out as came hard. Jason lifted her hips off the desk and three strokes later he came as well.

He lifted her into his arms and moved them to a chair. "_That was so incredible."_ Elizabeth told him snuggling against his chest.

_"We still have to talk."_

_"About what?"_

_"Where were going to live for starters."_

_"I was thinking the penthouse just for awhile. Till we can find a house."_

_"You want to buy a house?"_

_"Yeah kids need room to play."_ Jaosn said with a shrug.

_"That's another thing. Cameron."_

_"What about him?"_

_"He loves Lucky Jason. He's the only dad Cam's ever had."_

_"I'd never mess with that. I care about Cameron and I'd never treat him any different."_

_"I know but he might have a hard time with all this."_

_"We'll handle it."_

_"Then there's Lucky and Sam. We have to tell them."_

_"I know. They should hear it from us."_

_"Jason, will you be with me when I tell Lucky?"_

_"You worried he might hurt you?"_

_"A little."_

_"Then I'll be there. I promise to do my best to protect you and the children."_

_"I know I trust you. When did you want to tell them?"_

_"Is now too soon?"_

_"Not at all"_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Spinelli watch Elizabeth pace around the coffeehouse and mutter to herself. Her nervousness has making him nervous. Or maybe it was because he had no idea what was happening. Jason seemed okay. Though with him it was hard to tell. _"Stone Cold?"_ He said from the office door.

_"Umm... Nurse Hot.. I mean Elizabeth is is really freaking me out man."_

_"What's she doing?"_

_"Pacing around. Oh, and mumbling."_

_"Don't worry she's fine. Let me know if she stops."_

It hadn't been difficult to get Lucky and Sam to the coffeehouse. Jason was grateful for that at least he had already warned Milo what was getting ready to happen. In Jason's opinion Lucky was a loose cannon just waiting to go off. Sam wasn't much better but she would react with tears instead of violence. Well he hoped anyways.

_"Thanks Milo. Remember what I said."_

Jason left the office to discover Elizabeth and Lucky were already arguing. He decided against jumping in. instead he watched quietly from the doorway. _"Lucky just listen to me."_

_"Fine explain."_

_"I'm sorry I'm hurting you. I am but we can't keep going on like this. We're both so unhappy."_

_"No we're not."_

_"Okay, maybe you're not but I am. I'm sorry."_

_"You're sorry? Well that's just not good enough you belong to me. You'll rid of me. I will always be in your life. So you might as well face facts."_

_"That's were you're wrong I don't want anything to do with you. I know Cam loves you but I don't know about that either."_

_"You won't keep my child from me."_

_"This baby isn't yours Lucky."_

_"You slut! Does Robin know Patrick knocked you up?"_

_"It's not Patrick's"_

_"No. It's Jason's isn't it?"_ Sam said as she walked in.

_"Yes it is."_

"How could you do this to me?" Sam asked as she started to cry.

_"I didn't do this to hurt you. But I love Elizabeth, Cameron, and our child. I want to be with them."_

"She doesn't belong to you Morgan."  


_"She's not property Lucky. She free to do what she wishes."_

_"Well Elizabeth?"_

_"Lucky I don't want to hurt you."_

_"So you **are** choosing this brain damaged thug over me?"_

_"I love him."_

_"He doesn't love you he only wants his baby."_ Sam declared.

_"Enough!"_ Jason yelled. _"It's over. Elizabeth and I want to be together. You two are not going to stop us. Now get out."_Lucky and Sam stormed out with some persuasion from Milo. When it had calmed down Jason went over to Elizabeth and pulled her into his arm. _"I'm sorry."_ She sobbed into his chest.

_"Stop. You didn't do anything wrong. Neither did I. I promise I make this pain wroth it."_

_"I'm holding you to that."_

_"So does this mean the Jackal has to move?"_

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Two months later...

Jason sat beside Elizabeth watching their newborn son nurse. He had thought she was beautiful before but now he couldn't get enough of either one of them.

_"I love you too. So have you given any more thought to a name?"_

_"I don't care just not Jason."_

_"But I like the name Jason."_ Elizabeth told him teasingly.

Jason smiled as memories washed over him._"Jake is perfect. What about a middle name?"_

_"I was thinking Alan. Monica has been so great these last few months I know it would be a lot to her."_

_"And Dad too I'm sure."_ Jason thought about the fallout from revealing he was Jake's father. The whole town practically turned on them. Audrey had been hard to take. But the worst was Emily. She still attacked Elizabeth every chance she got. Of course Lucky and Sam still caused the occasional problem. To Jason's surprise Sonny and Carly weren't that much of a problem. Of course he had to draw the line more than once before they got the message.

Through it all Monica had became very important to his family. Cameron called her Grandmother and both Jason and Elizabeth called her Mom. He still missed not knowing Alan but he wasn't consumed by grief anymore. Things were just too good in his life.

They had settled into their new house only two weeks ago. The first thing Elizabeth did was paint the boys' rooms. She must have remembered their conversation on the docks because the nursery had a safari theme. Other than the small wedding service they had last month today was the best day of his life. Not just because Jake was born but this morning Cameron had called him daddy. It was something Jason had been secretly wishing for.

_"Jason are you okay?"_

_"Yeah, I was just thinking, about how excited Spinelli and Cameron are going to be."_

_"I can't believe you gave him the penthouse."_

_"He wasn't living with us. Besides we don't need it anymore."_ Jason said leaning over to kiss both his wife and son. _"Didn't I tell you I'd make it worth the pain."_ He said softly.

**The End**


End file.
